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Old 08-22-2007, 08:53 PM   #1
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I just read this one at Maxing Out's blog...I like it a lot.

7. Cruising let's you share a back porch with a billionaire. In Turkey we anchored next to a diamond merchant's 200 foot megayacht for two days. He spent 50 million dollars to visit the same destination as us. Some people buy floating condominiums and some people buy the sailing equivalent of a cargo crate, but we all meet at the same barbecue pit on the beach.

Does anyone have some nuggets or pearls of wisdom to share?

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Old 08-23-2007, 02:33 AM   #2
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Originally Posted by Trim50 View Post
Does anyone have some nuggets or pearls of wisdom to share?
How about a Cruising fact of life ?

The day that you take delivery of a brand new boat - is the day you start maintenance

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Old 08-23-2007, 01:25 PM   #3
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“There's no thrill in easy sailing when the skies are clear and blue, there's no joy in merely doing things which any one can do. But there is some satisfaction that is mighty sweet to take, when you reach a destination that you never thought you'd make”

“If one does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favorable.”

Seneca quotes (Roman philosopher, mid-1st century AD)

"When in doubt, let it out."

- Anonymous

A strong nor’-wester ’s blowing, Bill!

Hark! don’t ye hear it roar now?

Lord help ’em, how I pities them

Unhappy folks on shore now!

-The Sailor’s Consolation

Abbey, Henry; 1842-1911

What do we plant when we plant the tree?

We plant the ship that will cross the sea,

We plant the mast to carry the sails,

We plant the planks to withstand the gales-

The keel, the keelson, and beam and knee-

We plant the ship when we plant the tree.
"The sail, the play of its pulse so like our own lives: so thin and yet

so full of life, so noiseless when it labors hardest, so noisy and

impatient when least effective."

-Henry David Thoreau
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Old 08-23-2007, 01:31 PM   #4
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Posts: 48

"My experience with engines is that if you depend on them they fail you, but if it just doesn't matter, they serve you."

-Frank Wightman

"He was now convinced that the most valuable sail on board was the diesel."

-Ray Kauffman

"Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm."

-Syrus Pubilius

"It isn't that life ashore is distasteful to me. But life at sea is better."

-Sir Francis Drake

"The art of the sailor is to leave nothing to chance."

-Annie Van De Wiele

"If you can't repair it, maybe it shouldn't be on board."

-Lin and Larry Pardey

"Ships are the nearest thing to dreams that hands have ever made."

-Robert N. Rose

"There is nothing- absolutely nothing-

half so much worth doing

as simply messing about in boats."

-Ratty said to Mole in Kenneth Grahame's beloved 1908

classic, The Wind in the Willows.

"Land was created to provide a place for boats to visit."

-Brooks Atkinson

"You're only as young as the last time you changed your mind."

-Timothy Leary

"Only two sailors, in my experience, never ran aground. One never left

port and the other was an atrocious liar."

-Don Bamford

"Out of sight of land the sailor feels safe. It is the beach that

worries him."

-Charles G. Davis

"The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist

expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails."

-William A. Ward

"Ships that pass in the night and speak each other in passing;

Only a signal shown and a distant voice in the darkness;

So on the ocean of life we pass and speak one another,

Only a look and a voice; then darkness again and a silence."

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


"The sail, the play of its pulse so like our own lives: so thin and yet

so full of life, so noiseless when it labors hardest, so noisy and

impatient when least effective."

-Henry David Thoreau
"The sail, the play of its pulse so like our own lives: so thin and yet

so full of life, so noiseless when it labors hardest, so noisy and

impatient when least effective."

-Henry David Thoreau
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Old 08-23-2007, 01:38 PM   #5
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Well done yachtmaster.

"if at first you don't succeed....Redefine success"!

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Old 08-23-2007, 07:32 PM   #6
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I heard it was the most expensive way to travel third class.
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Old 08-23-2007, 07:51 PM   #7
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Here are a few of my favourites......

"Sailing alone soothes me because the sea is fair, not cruel. It judges only your ability. It does not care who or what you are. It does not ask your

age, color, sex, address, sexual orientation, education or IQ, but only your competence. It requires only that you can sail. If you can, you survive. If

you can't, better stay ashore. That's fair, more fair than most of us experience on land...and refreshing."

A sure cure for seasickness? Stand under a tree.

Let those who know not how to pray go to sea.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Give a man a boat, he cannot afford to eat again.

Everything I need to know about life, I learned from Noah's Ark:

One: Don't miss the boat.

Two: Remember that we are all in the same boat.

Three: Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the Ark.

Four: Stay fit. When you're 600 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.

Five: Don't listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done.

Six: Build your future on high ground.

Seven: For safety's sake, travel in pairs.

Eight: Speed isn't always an advantage. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.

Nine: When you're stressed, float a while.

Ten: Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic by professionals.

'In all systems, as complexity approaches infinity, the mean time between failure drops to zero.'

"Most of my money I spent on boats and women. The rest I squandered'.

"When I die, I want to go quietly, in my sleep; like my grandfather.

Not screaming in terror like his passengers."

CANNON BALLS: In the heyday of sailing ships, all war ships and many freighters carried iron cannons. Those cannons fired round iron cannon balls. It was necessary to keep a good supply near the cannon, but prevent them from rolling about the deck. The best storage method devised was a square based pyramid with one ball on top, resting on four resting on nine which rested on sixteen. Thus, a supply of thirty cannon balls could be stacked in a small area right next to the cannon. There was only one problem - how to prevent the bottom layer from sliding/rolling from under the others. The solution was a metal plate called a "Monkey," with sixteen round indentations. If this plate was made of iron, the iron balls would quickly rust to it. The solution to the rusting problem was to make "Brass Monkeys." Few landlubbers realize that brass contracts much more and much faster than iron when chilled. Consequently, when the temperature dropped too far, the brass indentations would shrink so much that the cannon balls would come right off the monkey. Thus, it was quite literally, "Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey!"

"Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, much of that comes from bad judgment."

Girls don't lay down in boats they can't stand up in.

Lecky's Wrinkles:

"There is nothing so distressing as running ashore, unless there is also doubt as to which continent the shore belongs."

"There is never any excuse to put the comfort of the crew above the safety of the vessel"

"To me, nothing made by man is more beautiful than a sailboat under way in fine weather, and to be on that sailboat is to be as close to heaven as I expect to get. It is unalloyed happiness."

"The gods do not deduct from a man's allotted span, those days spent sailing."

"Them that dies'll be the lucky ones"

- Long John Silver in Treasure Island

Sailboats are safe in a harbor. But that's not what boats were made for.

To quote Mark Twain:

"Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed

by the things you did not do than by the things you did do.

So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor.

Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice.

In practice, there is."

"The gravity of the situation is only increased by the slant of the ramp"

A small boat and a suitcase full of money beats a 40 footer tied to the Bank every time.

This new ship here is fitted according to the reported increase of knowledge among mankind. Namely, she is cumbered end to end, with bells and trumpets and clock and wires . . . she can call voices out of the air of the waters to con the ship while her crew sleep. But sleep Thou lightly. It has not yet been told to me that the Sea has ceased to be the Sea.

- Rudyard Kipling

"The man who would be fully employed should procure a ship or a woman, for no two things produce more trouble" - Plautus 254-184 B.C.

"There are three kinds of people in the world,

Those who can count and those who can't."

In the long run, all solutions are temporary, so go ahead and use duct tape.

Flashlight: A cylindrical object that is used to store dead batteries.

And why do you, lad, look so pale?

Is it for love, or lack of ale?

"A powerboat and a sailboat both went to sea. From the powerboat, voices asked - when will we get there? From the sailboat, voices answered - we are!!!"

Sir Francis Bacon, "They are ill discoverers that think there is no land, when they can see nothing but sea."

"Son, you have to remember that people like terra firma - the more firma, the less terra."

"Nothing goes to windward like a 747."

Nothing is as permanent as a good temporary solution."

In rough and rolling seas all good sailors sit to pee

Only a fool becomes embroiled in an argument on a singlehanded boat.

"You can observe a lot just by watching."

Approaching a dock with a boat it is like approaching a woman in a bar,

very seldom is a slow approach a poor approach."

"That packet of assorted miseries which we call a ship." - Rudyard Kipling

'If you have to be somewhere by a certain date, you aren't cruising, you're racing.

and my absolute favourite of all time...

"My drinking team has a sailing problem!"

And then there was the letter from the ship's master......

Letter to the Owners

To: Owners

Shipping Company Y

Dear Sirs,

It is with regret and haste that I write this letter to you; regret that such a small misunderstanding could lead to the following circumstances, and haste in order that you will get this report before you form your own preconceived opinions from reports in the international press, for I am sure that they will tend to over-dramatize the affair.

We had just picked up the pilot, and the apprentice had returned from changing the 'G' flag for the 'H', and being his first trip was having difficulty in rolling the 'G' flag up. I therefore proceeded to show him how, coming to the last part I told him to 'let go'. The lad, although willing, is not too bright, necessitating my having to repeat the order in a sharper tone.

At this moment the Chief Officer appeared from the chartroom, having been plotting the vessel's progress, and thinking that it was the anchors that were being referred to, repeated the 'let go' to the Third Officer on the forecastle. The port anchor, having been cleared away, but not walked out, was promptly let go. The effect of letting the anchor drop from the 'pipe' while the vessel was proceeding at full harbour speed proved too much for the windlass brake, and the entire length of the port cable was pulled out 'by the roots'. I fear that the damage to the chain locker may be extensive. The braking effect of the port anchor naturally caused the vessel to sheer in that direction, right towards the swing bridge that spans a tributary to the river up which we were proceeding.

The swing bridge operator showed great presence of mind by opening the bridge for my vessel. Unfortunately he did not think to stop the vehicular traffic. The result being that the bridge partly opened and deposited a Volkswagen, two cyclists and a cattle truck on the foredeck. My ship's company are at present rounding up the contents of the latter, which from the noise I would say were pigs. In his efforts to stop the progress of the vessel the Third Officer dropped the starboard anchor, too late to be of practical use for it fell on the swing bridge operator's control cabin.

After the port anchor was let go and the vessel started to sheer I gave a double ring Full Astern on the Engine Room Telegraph, and personally rang the Engine Room to order maximum astern revolutions. I was informed that the temperature was 83 degrees, and was asked if there was a film tonight. My reply would not add constructively to this report.

Up to now I have confined my report to the activities at the forward end of my vessel. Down aft they were having their own problems. At the moment the port anchor was let go, the Second Officer was supervising the making fast of the aft tug, and was lowering the ship's towing spring down into the tug.

The sudden braking effect of the port anchor caused the tug to 'run in under' the stern of my vessel, just at the moment when the propeller was answering my double ring Full Astern. The prompt action of the Second Officer in securing the shipboard end of the towing spring delayed the sinking of the tug by some minutes thereby allowing the safe abandoning of that vessel.

It is strange, but at the very same moment of letting go the port anchor there was a power cut ashore. The fact that we were passing over a 'cable area' at that time may suggest that we may have touched something on the river bed. It is perhaps lucky that the high tension cables brought down by the foremast were not live, possibly being replaced by the underwater cable, but owing to the shore blackout it is impossible to say where the pylon fell.

It never fails to amaze me, the actions and behavior of foreigners during moments of minor crisis. The pilot for instance, is at this moment huddled in the corner of my day cabin, alternately crooning to himself and crying after having consumed a bottle of gin in a time that is worthy of inclusion in the Guinness Book of Records. The tug captain on the other hand reacted violently and had to forcibly be restrained by the Steward, who has him handcuffed in the ship's hospital while he is telling me to do impossible things with my ship and my person.

I enclose the names and addresses of the drivers, and insurance companies of the vehicles on my foredeck, which the Third Officer collected after his somewhat hurried evacuation of the forecastle. These particulars will enable you to claim back the damage that they did to the railings of number one hold.

I am closing this preliminary report for I am finding it difficult to concentrate with the sound of police sirens and the flashing lights.

It is sad to think that had the apprentice realized that there is no need to fly pilot flags after dark, none of this would have happened.

Yours truly,

Master m.v. ………………………..
Yacht NAUSIKAA | Call Sign: 2AJH2



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Old 08-23-2007, 07:56 PM   #8
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And an interesting bit of historical background...although off topic and nothing to do with sailing.....for which I make no appologies this time.

Giving the Finger

Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers. Without the middle finger it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow and therefore they would be incapable of fighting in the future.

This famous weapon was made of the native English yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as "plucking the yew" (or "pluck yew"). Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and began mocking the French by waving their middle fingers at the defeated French, saying, "See, we can still pluck yew! "PLUCK YEW!"

Since 'pluck yew' is rather difficult to say, the difficult consonant cluster at the beginning has gradually changed to a labiodental fricative 'F', and thus the words often used in conjunction

with the one-finger-salute!

It is also because of the pheasant feathers on the arrows used with the longbow that the symbolic

gesture is known as "giving the bird."

And yew thought yew knew everything!
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Old 08-23-2007, 07:57 PM   #9
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Old 08-23-2007, 08:01 PM   #10
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and off topic again, for which I appologise this time as I am way off topic but our South African "okes" just need to see this letter.......

Dear Ma and Pa

I am well. Hope you are. Tell my boetie Wouter and my other boetie Koos that being in the Kommandos beats working for Oom Piet by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before maybe all of the places are filled. I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 am, but am now starting to enjoy sleeping late.

Tell Wouter and Koos all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things. No varke to feed, no cows to milk, no mampoer to mix or braai wood to split. Practically nothing. Manne get to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water.

Breakfast is strong on fruit juice, pap, eggs, bacon, etc. but short on steaks, boerewors, chops, potatoes and other regular food like vetkoek. But tell my boeties you can always sit between two dorpies that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon, when you get fed again.

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "route" marches, which the Sersant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him different. A "route march" is about as far as to our postbox at home. Then the dorpies get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

The country is nice, but awful flat.

This next will kill my boeties with laughter. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a dassie's head and doesn't move at all. And it isn't shooting back at you like those bliksemse Venter boys from the next door plaas. All you have to do is lie there all rustig like and hit it. You don't even have to make your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with the dorpies. I have to be really careful though, they break real easy. It's not like fighting with Swart Duivel, our old bull at home. I'm about the best they got in this platoon except for that Groot Jan Jordaan from somewhere in the Noord Transvaal. He joined up the same time as me. But I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds and he's 6'8" and weighs over 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell my boeties to hurry and join before other okes find out about this Kommando setup and come stampeding in!

Your loving daughter, Esther
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Old 08-23-2007, 09:09 PM   #11
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I am reminded that I need to buy a new print cartridge today.

"if at first you don't succeed....Redefine success"!

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Old 08-26-2007, 06:55 AM   #12
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After a good day's sail there is nothing som nice as a beer, a bottle of wine with dinner and a wee dram afterwards. So here too are a few of my favourite quotes on this sympathetic and profound subject..... anyone got an opener?

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning,

that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

Frank Sinatra

The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.

William Butler Yeats

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his


Ernest Hemingway

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep

your mouth shut.

Ernest Hemingway

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Dean Martin

Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it.


No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or as good as


G.K. Chesterton

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.

Catherine Zandonella

Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a


Ambrose Bierce

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.


Drinking provides a beautiful excuse to pursue the one activity that

truly gives me pleasure, hooking up with fat hairy girls.

Ross Levy

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

W.C. Fields

What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?

W.C. Fields

Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder.


If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs.

David Daye

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.

Oscar Wilde

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

Henny Youngman

Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the

time and have the time of your life.

Michelle Mastrolacasa

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me, than a full frontal lobotomy.

Tom Waits

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence ?

Stephen Wright

When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we

fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all

get drunk, and go to heaven...

Brian O'Rourke

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it

helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons,

but at the very least you need a beer.

Frank Zappa

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has

taken out of me.

Winston Churchill

He was a wise man who invented beer.


Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Benjamin Franklin

If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes

beer shoot out your nose.

Deep Thought, Jack Handy

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer.

Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

Dave Barry

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.

Humphrey Bogart

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

Kaiser Wilhelm

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.

Homer Simpson

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen,

for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.


I drink to make other people interesting.

George Jean Nathan

All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do

this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.

Homer Simpson
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Old 08-29-2007, 08:57 AM   #13
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Here are a few more...

Some older friends named Bob and Rose sailing on "Fair Rose" a Westsail 36

used to end their snail mail notes:

"May the wind be behind you and may it not be your own!"

I love this one:

"The liver is evil... it must be punished!"

B.J.Smith SY Sooke
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Old 08-29-2007, 09:06 AM   #14
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And then there is this one.......

"Houses are but badly built boats so firmly aground that you cannot think of moving them. They are definitely inferior things, belonging to the vegetable not the animal world, rooted and stationary, incapable of gay transition. I admit, doubtfully, as exceptions, snailshells and caravans. The desire to build a house is the tired wish of a man content thenceforward with a single anchorage. The desire to build a boat is the desire of youth, unwilling yet to accept the idea of a final resting place.

It is for that reason perhaps, that when it comes, the desire to build a boat is one of those that cannot be resisted. It begins as a little cloud on a serene horizon. It ends by covering the whole sky, so that you can think of nothing else. You must build to regain your freedom. And always you comfort yourself with the thought that yours will be the perfect boat, the boat that you may search the harbors of the world for and not find."

Arthur Ransome

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